A Death in Tobruk
So as Im working on a summary and a bibliography update for 2025, I thought i’d share my latest piece. I was reading about Libya a lot recently - from the old Cyrenaica and Pentapolis period and all the way to the current interim government. I’ll readily admit to not being an expert but the stories I read definitely made me want to write about it.
P.S
It’s about neither Gaddafi, Idris nor the Battle of Tobruk. It’s a bit of everything and a bit unrelated. I picked Tobruk mainly because I love the way it sounds and it fit geographically. Gaddafi died in Sirte while Idris died in exile in Cairo.
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A Death in Tobruk
There's a violence to the soil here
A whispering hatred in the flying sand
There's nothing to fear here
Nothing to grasp with bleeding, ashen hands
I saw a future once
But it hid and I never saw it again
Horses and camels lay dead here
Their bones dot the endless wastes
Burnt tires and gasoline fumes
In the air, spinning twine, cruel fates
I saw a future once
But it hid and I never saw it again
The far reaches of empire
Another quietly burning fire
I lived as I died
A murderer, a hero - a liberator, a liar
I saw a future once...
Acherad, "To Fear Helios, To Be Helios" and The Perpetual Katabasis!
The funny thing about me as a writer is that, while I have a huge amount of faith in my work, I still get hit by shock whenever I see its impact or how far it travels. When Rex approached me about using some of my poetry for his new band, Acherad, I was very excited. Seeing someone bring life to and interpret my poetry was a fascinating experience. It was almost witnessing metamorphosis - I saw the most difficult winter of my life evolve.
Horrible experiences which ate at me, and still do, became stanzas and poems. Those poems and works, in the hands of Acherad, became music and song. And now, while those experiences still feel like a dagger in the gut, I feel we reached into that wound together and pulled out something profound.
It was awe inspiring for me to hear it. From there on, we collaborated on the rest of the tracks. Our work together explored a bunch of topics from a variety of places. I am perhaps most proud of our expeditions into Hittite mythology, it was a trip and a half to delve into it and the lyrics we pulled out ( "Illuyanka" and "On Spears Engraved") are some of my favorites on the whole album.
So, to summarize, I'm extremely proud to have been (and still be!) part of The Eternal Katabasis and I hope you all enjoy.
https://youtu.be/rZQkaJ3em-I?si=KzqfaBji5j_ZubO0
The poem "To Fear Helios, To Be Helios":
To Fear Helios, To Be Helios
We float in coffins
Dead but awake
All the burdens of pseudo life
For us to shoulder and take
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There came a time that never left
There was a beauty shown in jest
There came killers to wrest
And Solon said it best
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The journey is long,
The sun burns the brittle coffin wood
Cruel cosmos draws in
Our ashes become so much refuse
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There came a time that never left
The few, the proud were left bereft
There's no climbing back from these depths
And Wilde said it best
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If time won't leave then I must
To where you, the others, couldn't
And if it were in my power to save you all
Rest assured, my fellows, I wouldn't
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Despair, sadness, heartbreak, lies
(Rest assured, my fellows, I wouldn't )
Pain, blood, spit, gauged eyes
(Rest assured, my fellows, I wouldn't )
Beg, plead, barter, bargain
Rest assured, I won't
A Leper to Lepers
The chains embedded in my flesh
They creak and drag upon the skin
My limbs have not been my own for so long
Mine are not the words I sing
And though I am Fenrir, you are the chain
And though I am Prometheus, I plead in vain
The gods would keep me no longer
A leper to lepers!
The world grows suddenly still
Who will be the first to draw?
Spit at my vanity
I contain more than you'll ever know
And though I am Judas, you are my field
And though I am Typhon, I'm struck by your will
The gods would keep me no longer
A leper to lepers!
I know the worth of my vanity
I know the worth of my enmity
I know you fear me
A leper to lepers!
Leper to lepers to lepers to lepers to lepers
Explanation of cover -
In ancient times, lepers were typically marked by different items beyond their distinctive appearance. One I could not convey was a type of tunic that would hide their torso and put an extra layer between them and you. But in the picture there are three others-
A rattler (left) and a bell (right) were used to inform people a leper is passing by. These were some of the earliest means of avoiding communicable disease.
a mask - many lepers chose to wear a mask to hide their disfigurement. While traditionally they wore a leather or cloth mask, the richer the leper the fancier the mask would be.
The Hebrew word is for leper. Interestingly the etymology in Hebrew for leper is “he in whom evil is found” or he who is struck by evil".”
Herakles Δ - Apotheosis
In the last part of my Herakles series, I decided to make a piece exploring apotheosis. For those that don't know, following his death, Herakles was elevated by Zeus from a demigod to a god. The process of becoming a god is rendered apotheosis* in both English and Ancient Greek.
The reason why I chose to zero in on this in the last part, even though our Theban friend's story was not at an end, is to discern whether this was a boon or a burden. Here was a creature who, for all his heroism, suffered greatly in life psychologically. He toiled and accomplished amazing things, but Herakles' scars were many and accumulating. The question then becomes - does apotheosis cure him of these concerns or is he, in a way, cursed to forever carry this burden with him?
As the venom eats at my chest,
The Hydra's venom carries me to my rest
I look beyond the flame of my pyre
To Zeus' behest
Am I damned or blessed?
For my immortality I go not sleep
And though many kneel before me,
The price of apotheosis is steep
My shoulders held heavens, east to west
But will this labor be one I can wrest?
"It's hard to tell sometime" I think, in jest,
Whom the gods adore and whom they detest
Am I damned or am I blessed?
For my apotheosis I go not sleep
And in darkness I find myself asking
Who does the keeper keep?
The future is eternal here
For the first time I feel fear
But the morrow, ruthless, it comes
And I greet it in fighting spirit and good cheer